What is Love?
God is love, but love is not God. Many people today have a false and misconstrued understanding of what love is and what love looks like. Contrary to popular opinion today, love is not nice words, pleasant tones, or being approving or agreeable. Love is not an emotion or a feeling. Love is a verb. It requires action. It is based on the will. It is a decision. Being "loving" or "gentle" does not mean acquiescing, giving in, accommodating, or being a pushover. Being "loving" or "gentle" does not mean always being "nice" or "polite" as society may interpret it. Being "loving" or "gentle" does not mean you are never disagreeable or that you never upset the status quo. Being "loving" or "gentle" does not mean you will never get angry, but that when you do you will be in full control of your anger and you will not lash out like a complete psychopath. When parents have to rebuke, correct, or discipline their children, are they somehow being "unloving"? Of course not! You have heard of the term "tough love," have you not?
The feeling of "love"—the world's definition of "love"—is nothing more than a fleeting feeling of lust, infatuation, passion, and heat of the moment. It is not real love. It is a cheap imitation. It is a counterfeit. To many professing Christians today, "love" has become synonymous with being "nice" and approving things (including those things for which they ought to know better). It has taken on an eerily similar definition to the world's false definition of love. Most people's concept of "love" today is an agreeable Hippie kind of love like that of the 60s, which is a basis for Universalism. "Everybody should get along." "Let's all just be nice." "Live and let live." This is a false and demonic definition of what love is. This is not biblical love!
"Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails."
If love "believes all things," does that include falsehoods, lies, heresy, and false doctrine? Quite obviously not! While everything stated in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a is true, nevertheless it is not an exhaustive list of what love is. For example:
- Real love needs to be rooted and anchored in Yahweh Himself: "God is love."
- Real love is obedient to Yahweh: "If you love Me, you will keep My commandments."
- Real love is marked by truth: "...those who perish...did not receive the love of the truth..." Where truth is absent, love ceases to exist; it is merely emotional euphoria.
- Real love is without hypocrisy, and it hates evil: "Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil; cling to what is good."
- Real love is marked by increasing knowledge and discernment: "And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in real knowledge and all discernment." If knowledge and discernment are stagnant, stifled, stunted, or regressing, either the Holy Spirit is powerless, or you are not abiding in Christ, which means you are walking in disobedience. If you are abiding in His love, the Spirit of truth will guide you into all truth, which means knowledge and discernment will be increasing. This is exactly how it works. If your Christian life is stunted, it is because you are not exhibiting true love. If you were, then all these things would be increasing, which would be making you more holy and more Christ-like, precisely as the Scriptures imply.
Real love also does not merely look upon victims; it also looks upon perpetrators. It is not merely sad and tragic for the victims and what was done to them, it is also sad and tragic for the perpetrators and how they could do such atrocities. You cannot claim to be "loving" if you cannot look upon people like Stalin and Hitler and feel as much compassion for them as you feel for the victims of their deeds. You cannot claim to be "loving" if you cannot look upon rapists and pedophiles and feel as much compassion for them as you feel for their victims. Both cases are sad and tragic, but in different ways. Both deserve compassion, understanding, and pity. This does not mean that we let perpetrators off the hook, make excuses for them, or that they are not punished by the proper authorities. It means that could have been you but for the grace of Yahweh. I am talking about biblical love, that shows no partiality. You remember that? "Love your neighbour as yourself." "Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you."
Would you like to see what love in action looks like? Then look no further than the life of Christ Jesus. Jesus was the personification of love. In every single moment, He exemplified love. Nothing He did was ever without love, gentleness, or grace. Every moment of Jesus' life was the perfect expression of true love. In any moment, not one single drop of love was lacking. If you want to see what love looks like in all of its forms, pick any moment from the life of Jesus and know that what you are seeing is true love in absolute perfection. Jesus was not always nice, nor did He always speak in soft tones. He certainly was not agreeable or approving. Everything He did was in, and out of, love. Yet, how many "Christians" today would not accuse Jesus of "lacking compassion," "lacking grace," being "unloving," or "unChrist-like," and be the first to crucify Him?
In Matthew 23, Jesus pronounces woe eight times! He calls these people hypocrites seven times! He calls them blind guides and blind men four times! He calls them sons of hell! He calls them fools! He says they are robbers and self-indulgent! He says they are dead men! He calls them serpents and brood of vipers! Elsewhere He says they are the children of their father the devil! Not once was Jesus' attitude, behaviour, or words ever without love. Jesus said exactly what these people needed to hear in that moment. The idea that Christians must always be "nice" and speak in "pleasant tones" and approve of everything comes directly from the father of lies and straight out of the pit of Hell! Shame on any self-professing Christian who advocates and promotes such godless, unbiblical nonsense! Yes, we should be peaceable with all men. Yes, we should be respectful and not rude. But... we should also be harsh and abrasive when it is required.
Sarcasm, satire, and mockery are effective ways of dealing with people and exposing them to the truth. It is not "unloving" to do so! Employing sarcasm, satire, or mocking is only sinful if your motive for doing so is not pure; if you are merely doing so to make fun of other people (as it is typically employed by atheists). Was Elijah's intent by using it to make fun of the worshippers of Baal? Was Jesus' intent by using it to make fun of the Pharisees and Sadducees? Was Paul's intent by using it to make fun of those who were bothering the Galatians? The only person who can judge your use of it to know whether it is actually sinful or not is you. The Bible is filled with such examples to demonstrate the utter ridiculousness of man's religions and practices. As any good, intelligent parent knows, anger and love are not mutually exclusive.
As with David Wood of Acts17Apologetics, several professing Christians over the years have accused me of being "abrasive." They usually have ignorant things to say, such as, "I'm ashamed to count him among us." The shame belongs to them, for not having a backbone to stand up and defend the truth, but always compromising it. My writing style is intended to challenge. Many readers are not accustomed to this style of writing and tend to misrepresent my tone. These Christians also have this false idea that "you will never win souls by being abrasive." I am sorry, but that not only betrays an ignorance of biblical knowledge and understanding, but it also reveals an ignornace as to cultural differences. When David Wood witnessed to the late Nabeel Qureshi (a former Muslim), he did so from the typical Westerner's "loving" and "gentle" approach. Because of this, Nabeel believed that David did not actually believe what he claimed to believe. Nabeel's own responses were loud, strong, passionate, and filled with anger. He absolutely believed what he was saying, and his "abrasiveness" was the evidence that what he was saying had to be true. This is what the Muslim culture is like. I have witnessed this in my own interactions with them. If you try to use the "gentle, loving" approach on Muslims, it will get you nowhere fast; they will look at you as if you are weak (because you probably are). They predominantly respond only to strength and force. According to a Russian woman I used to work with, even Russians have a particular cultural interaction that differs from the Westerner's "loving" and "gentle" concept.
If I am abrasive, it is because what I am saying is exactly what certain types of people need to hear in order to wake them from their slumber. My abrasiveness is typically directed toward the religious elite and the religious hypocrites. Intelligent individuals know that different people and different circumstances warrant different responses. Only a fool would ass-u-me that every case ought to be treated exactly the same. Why did Jesus not deal with everyone in the exact same manner? Because they were completely different people, different circumstances, different degrees of knowledge, different levels of egregious behaviour, and different levels of obstinence. "To whom much is given, much will be required." Religious hypocrites deserve a harsher, more abrasive tone than does a genuinely ignorant individual who does not know better. In no way, shape, or form does that indicate that you are "unloving" or "lacking grace." When I am speaking with a person face-to-face, I begin with the gentle approach, and depending upon their obstinence and behaviour, my approach will change in order to meet them where they need it. With writing, it is completely different. There is no way I can know which type of person is going to read my writings. With my books, I take the gentle approach, taking the reader by the hand and leading them, allowing them to see for themselves what the Bible teaches. With my blog articles, since I am attacking lies and aberrant theology, I take the slightly harsher approach so that those who need to hear what I am saying will hear it.
Most professing "Christians" today have zero integrity, honour, or boldness. Their life and their doctrine are at odds. They make profession with their lips but they walk not according to their talk. As Brennan Manning has said, "The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians: who acknowledge Jesus with their lips, walk out the door, and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable." Like the Pharisees, they are disobedient, rebellious, and hypocritical. Does any of this describe you? If so, repent and start walking in the likeness and power of Christ Jesus.
"Don't judge me! You don't know what's in my heart!"
I do not have to know your heart; I just need to see what you do with your body, because what you do with your body will tell me exactly what is going on in your heart. Do not think that there is some sort of strange dualism or dichotomy within you that you can somehow separate one part of you from another part of you. You are what you are before Yahweh. Do not use this excuse that your heart is somehow devoted while the rest of you is not! That is simply not true! Your heart is the control center of everything that you are. What you see in the mirror is what you see in your heart. Do not talk about a love for Christ that is not proven. Do not talk about a devotion to Christ where there is no evidence for said devotion.
Choose this day whom you will serve. "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord."